why do so many “icarus and the sun” artworks and stories portray the sun as a woman? do y’all know who controlled the sun? apollo. icarus is gay as fuck, y’all.
Sometimes it was helios, not Apollo. Icarus was still gay as fuck
“Icarus we just escaped prison don’t ruin it by flying too close to the sun”
[Icarus already fucking launching himself across the sky for the sake of some godly dick]
woops
Guy getting himself killed to get some godly dick is propably the most Greek thing to ever happen in mythology
I showed my friend this and he goes “Icarus want dat Dickarus
“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.
A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.
I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,
willowfoot 