Human!Omens as an excuse to draw Crowley with different-colored eyes (not very visible here but they are) but all I was thinking about is a set up where Crowley is a hellishly good tax collector and Aziraphale is a heavenly gifted tax evader and how rom-com would that be?
The Bentley plunged on through the darkness, its fuel gauge pointing to zero. It had pointed to zero for more than sixty years now. It wasn’t all bad, being a demon. You didn’t have to buy petrol, for one thing. The only time Crowley had bought petrol was once in 1967, to get the free James Bond bullet-hole-in-the-windscreen transfers, which he rather fancied at the time.
Most bookshops in Soho have back rooms, and most of the back rooms are filled with rare, or at least very expensive, books. But Aziraphale’s books didn’t have illustrations. They had brown covers and crackling pages. Occasionally, if he had no alternative, he’d sell one.
And, occasionally, serious men in dark suits would come calling and suggest, very politely, that perhaps he’d like to sell the shop itself so that it could be turned into the kind of retail outlet more suited to the area. Sometimes they’d offer cash, in large rolls of grubby fifty-pound notes. Or sometimes, while they were talking, other men in dark glasses would wander around the shop shaking their heads and saying how inflammable paper was, and what a firetrap he had here.
And Aziraphale would nod and smile and say that he’d think about it. And then they’d go away. And they’d never come back.
Just because you’re an angel doesn’t mean you have to be a fool.
The table in front of the two of them was covered in bottles.
“The point is,” said Crowley. “The point is. The point is.” He tried to focus on Aziraphale.
“The point is,” he said, trying to think of a point.
“The point I’m trying to make,” he said, brightening, “is the dolphins. That’s my point.”
Crowley deadass fuckin got humanity kicked out of eden cuz he thought it’d be a Funnie Joake what a precious bastard
I Can’t Believe Crowley And Aziraphale Are An Old Married Couple Who Go For Walks In The Park And Feed The Ducks Together
HELLO???????
full offence but those two getting absolutely smashed in the back room of aziraphale’s bookshop and arguing about dolphins is literally the funniest and gayest thing i’ve ever read in my life
aziraphale likes devilled eggs…..Meat of Four Icicles Subtext mayhaps??????
I’m fully SCREAMING
Crowley’s name is fucking Anthony I hate him
Guess I’ll die!!!!!!
AZIRAPHALE SAID FUCK
OH MY GOD HIS BOOKS
I was sat here crying over the books and my friend jesse said “at least the angel still has the most important thing to him” LIKE SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU’RE RIGHT
Is Aziraphale Fucking Dead
“Move, I’m Gay” – Aziraphale
rip 1926 bentley you were a good bitch
tag yourself….. i’m the guy who’s too polite to tell crowley his car is on fire
aziraphale was so upset crowley didn’t give a shit that he was alive that he fuckin killed a guy