listen. i am the daughter of a band teacher, i am a singer, and i am a former actress. when it came time for me to choose what to include in this musical meme… i entirely forgot that orchestra fucking existed.
ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE
i humbly present this alignment chart to you in the spirit of innovation and melodious gays.
love, your choir pan op
THEATRE QUEER
two memes in as many days that acknowledge me AND THEY’RE BY DIFFERENT PEOPLE
when ur hanging out in ur apartment u’ve got some candles lit ur feeling good u’ve had 8 glasses of wine then down in the street u hear two beautiful boys skateboarding or doing flips or something so u invite them up and they say where’s the bed and they ask if they can sit on the bed and u tell them sure but the sheets are expensive japanese linen and they tell u they’re not even soft:
Do you ever see people whose faces echo another era?
I’ve seen women with the round faces, sparse brows and high foreheads of medieval illuminated manuscripts.
Men with dark brows that meet in the middle, olive skin, strong noses and jaws–Byzantine men, ghosts of Constantine, reanimated faces from the Fayum Mummy Portraits.
Women with soft figures and the large eyes and prim, petaled mouths of the 19th century.
Grizzled men whose brows predicate their gaze, whose wrinkles track into their thick beards and read like topographical maps of hardship and intensity–the wanderer, the poet; Whitman, Tolstoy, Carlyle.
Faces sculpted into the perfect, deified symmetry of the pharaohs–almond eyes, full lips, self-assurance 3,000 years in the making staring at you at a stoplight.
Plump, curved white wrists curled over purse handles in the waiting room and you think Versailles, Madame Pompadour, Marie Antoinette, Catherine the Great. Wide cheek bones, courage and sorrow in the scrunched face of the old man in line behind you and it’s Geronimo, Sitting Bull, Tecumseh. Reddened skin, thick forearms, hair and beard and brows burned by the cold into a reddish corn silk and you think Odin, the forge and the hammer and skin stinging from the salt of the ocean.
Virginia Woolf’s quiet brand of gaunt frankness surveys you in passing in the parking lot. Queen Victoria’s heavy-lidded stare and beaked nose are firmly, uncannily fixed on a sixth-grade classmate’s face.
Renaissance voluptuousness on the boardwalk by the beach. Boticelli’s caramel androgyny in a youth smoking on a bench outside the mall.
Jazz age looseness spurs the tripping gait of the man who watches you paint with his hands in his pockets, and he smiles a Sammy Davis Jr. smile and tells you that you look familiar, that he’s sure he’s seen you somewhere before, but he doesn’t know where or when.
Thank you so much, anon! There are tons of guides online for dialogue punctuation (try here or here for full explanations), but here’s a quick refresher:
Bob said, “If your dialogue tag—’Bob said’ in this example—comes at the beginning, it should look like this.”
“If you’re using a dialogue tag at the end, end with a comma, and don’t capitalize your dialogue tag,” Bob said.
“If you split up the quoted sentence around the tag,” Bob said, “it should be punctuated like this.”
“Unless your quote is two separate sentences,” Bob said. “In that case, there is a period after the tag.”
“You can also leave out the dialogue tag completely, if you know for sure who’s talking.”
“What about question marks?” Bob said. “Shouldn’t we capitalize the tag after a question mark or exclamation point?”
“Nope!” said Bob. “You don’t need to unless the tag is naturally capitalized (as with I or a proper noun like a name like Bob).”
“Is it Bob said or said Bob?” asked Bob.
“It can be either,” Bob said, “but we don’t use ‘said she’ or ‘said I’ often anymore, so it is best to avoid those constructions with pronouns and use ‘I said’ and ‘they said’ unless you wish to sound archaic.”
Bob took a sip of coffee. “You can even include action, but as it is not a dialogue tag, put a period at the end of the action.”
“Really?” Bob leaned closer. “There are so many rules.”
I think that should cover most situations you might come across, but if you have anything specific I’m happy to help. Remember, you can always grab any fiction book off your shelves and find an example that’s a similar construction to what you’re writing. Or, just rewrite it to a construction you’re familiar with.
the fact that Love Simon’s tag lines are “he’s done keeping his story straight” and “coming out 2018” like….. they get us… bad puns are gay culture and they know that
talk to me about knights who can go around bashing peoples’ heads in but specifically choose to try and debate bad guys into submission instead
really though. a knight who’s famous throughout the kingdom for ridding it of Dark Lords and Unjust Tyrants. she is lauded as a hero and everyone assumes she’s the incarnation of justice with a sword.
one day there is a new bad guy. he is holed up in his Evil Fortress waiting for the knight to inevitably show up. however, what the rest of the kingdom doesn’t know is that he is the best swordsman on the continent. there is no way the knight will defeat him, and he knows it.
she arrives at his fortress to find him smugly slouching back in his Throne Of Darkness. “well?” he asks. “here to duel?”
“no,” she says, dropping a huge pile of papers that weigh as much as a small dragon on the table. “i’m here to tell you how trying to take over the kingdom is the worst idea you’ve ever had. let’s start with your background in necromancy and complete lack of education in civic duties. how do you expect to run this country? here is a list of the current foreign issues were are facing and how you are completely unequipped to deal with them. stop trying to back out of the room, i’m just getting started. how do you expect to deal with a court full of nobles trying to undermine you at every turn if you can’t even hold up an argument with one knight? sit your ass back down”
THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW PLEASE I ADVISE YOU GUYS TO DRAW ALONG WITH BOB ROSS IN MS PAINT IT IS AN EXPERIENCE I AM SO CONFUSED BUT PLEASED FUCKING DO IT
Bob Ross teaches you using layering and color theory, which are principles which work no matter what you paint with. Some materials won’t blend the same as oils obviously, but as Ross himself said, “you can paint with almost anything.”
Paint along with whatever you have, it’s great practice.
willowfoot 